I recently found an explanation to keep myself sane and not get annoyed or angry, I think. People can only see what they understand including me.
When someone makes a joke about being depressed they don’t understand the complex and dying scenario behind depression. I know all of us are dying but some of us can really feel the death and to understand that, one needs to see it and to see it, they have to understand it.
When we casually say ‘grow up’ the ulterior motive behind saying that is either ‘don’t bug me’ or ‘DON’T BUG ME.’ I know it is easier to look away and a lot easier to forget. But is it something that is a solution. I know you will feel guilty for looking away when that person is no more around, I know you will try to educate others when that person is no more around, I know you will blame yourself when that person is no more around but that person is no more around, whatever the reason.
Why do we want people to ignore it or just shake it off?
The answer is simple, I think, we do not understand it so we do not see it.
We don’t see:
People committing suicide
Our world getting darker
People asking for help
Air getting smokier
Our body getting weaker
The earth dying
March was a month full of an empty feeling and somehow fulfilling at the same time.
I went on a road trip with one of my closest friends which was really amazing and something we’ve been planning for months.
I finished my creative writing course and now I feel a little bit professional. The class was an amazing and enlightening experience. In the class, I met so many intellectually developed and mentally skilled people. It was really hard to say goodbye and to accept that we won’t be discussing topics in the class every day.
I saw the Beauty and the Beast (La Beaut et la Beast) with my sister and it was amazing. I mean Emma Watson and a Disney production, it had to be amazing.
There was a lot more activity in the month but above events were a little more significant.
Mentally- I feel refreshed and ready to try writing in a different way.
Physically- I think it was the best month yet.
Conclusion- There’s always tomorrow (I hope).
There’s a mask that each of us wears, of the person we all want to be but not necessarily are. It’s just sometimes funny and sometimes daunting to see people try.
Try to be perfect
Try to be different
Try to be right
That’s something every one of us believes we are- right. We all have right opinions, we all make right decisions and we all are just right, always. That’s the race we are in, to be ultimately right. It’s a thing we all have built in.
In this race of being right, we all are becoming something that is not right.
We are becoming
Which is something not right, isn’t it!?
No, it is fine because we are saving our society from the ill components, aren’t we?
And what is our society, our society is something who yells gender equality *practices gender inequality*, it is where everyone gets freedom of speech and expression *that is why our criminal level is so high and increases every day*, it is something where logic isn’t required because we have superstition. It is where education isn’t required because we have religion. And the only place that deserves to stay clean is our homes *who cares about roads, parks etc.*
Our society and it’s rules are made by human species and it the ideal species. And the rules that we live by are not ancient, no, they do not belong to the 30’s because we live in 2017. And even if some rules are not compatible with the new generation so what, tradition is a real thing that we have to savour for as long as the humans live.
Somedays I want to change the world,
Somedays I am just happy to get up.
Somedays I want to help the needy,
Somedays I am the needy.
Somedays I smile, I sparkle,
Somedays I frown and I frown.
Somedays all it takes is a coffee,
Somedays it takes a lot more than that.
Somedays are definitely better than the others,
And the other somedays makes me better.
I think I lost the ‘Rule Book’,
There must be one. Right?
Otherwise, why do everyone expect certain things?
If they haven’t taught me, how am I to know!
I think I lost the ‘Rule Book’,
The one that had all the answers.
The answers to why can I do this,
And not that.
Why I have to be this,
And not that.
Why I should believe this,
And not that.
How could I lose it!
Wish I knew that it will be most used.
Why was I so careless?
Maybe the book had the answer.
Now, I am just something unhinged,
The book was the anchor.
Will I ever find it?
Help me find it.
I stuck to my resolution list and tried new things. February is a short month and makes me feel impotent at times but I fought through that feeling and did cool things *according to me*.
This month started okay, the first and second week was really basic life like classes, homework and blog.
Now the third week was the highlight of the month because it is the week in which I attended my first ever legit concert *yes, I am 20 years old* and got to see KANAN GILL perform.
*This is not me, this is my lucky friend Vatsla Sharma with Kanan Gill and Kenneth Sebastian. The picture was clicked using my phone*
And I also changed my hair, it is the shortest I have ever gotten my hair *It is I cannot make a ponytail short* and I really like it. I was looking for something different and it is the perfect amount of different.
*This is me sporting my short hair in front of a generator*
This was also the week when I attended my dear friend’s photography exhibition in which she won two awards. *not really my achievement but wanted to mention it*
*1st and last picture is by my friend, Aashima Bhutani for which she was awarded*
I wrote another poem which was inspired by my favourite quote in life and I am really proud of it so, you should definitely check it out *self-promo*.
And then the rest of the month was just basic life.
Mentally- It was enlightening as I got to try many different types of writing styles in class.
Physically- I had few lazy days but I think I did pretty good.
Conclusion- Live, It’s the only thing that makes sense.
Our days are limited,
Our breaths are counted.
Tomorrow is guaranteed. Is it?
Yesterday is gone. Completely?
Being alone is comfortable,
Being lonely is unspeakable.
Days are passing by, one by one,
Minutes turn into hours, hours into days and days into once upon a time.
Sitting here I read my ‘Before I Die’ list
Somethings are ticked off,
Somethings are cancelled off,
Some are just there, waiting to be something,
A memory, sweet one or even a bitter one.
Don’t know if I have a tomorrow,
Don’t know if yesterday was worth it.
But today, today I will live,
Something I always wished.